Dear Awkwardness,

I feel that I have a newfound appreciation for the expression "trip at the finish line".  Sure it has nothing to do with a literal finish line, or tripping, but still...I would say that dropping the pan of twelve servings of chicken  and sauce that I was delivering onto the church house kitchen door loosely qualifies.  Also, I love that I'm no longer trusted around chicken and that "I wouldn't want to do an Allison" is becoming a catch phrase among my presidency.

Chicken-less, but feeling sheepish,
Allison

Dear Awkwardness,

The next time my roommate has lots of people over and I try to tell a story, I would appreciate it if my attempts to say "I was in the bathroom getting ready" didn't come out as "I was in the bathroom getting married".  Because, let's be honest, those aren't the same thing.

Still single,
Allison

Dear Awkwardness,


So I got invited to a Mission Reunion on facebook and this is the comment I received a minute later,  "Um...not sure how to tell you this delicately...but on my sidebar it says "'Noralin Ellsworth is going to Mate!!!!!!'--Sunday, January 15 at 7:00pm" Now, I'm sure that that is pronounced Mah-tay, but it sure doesn't look like that. Just wanted you to know. Have a great day!"


Enough Said,
Nori

Dear Awkwardness,

I think we have a common acquaintance...  So I went to my Creative Writing class on Tuesday night and let's just say that my professor is probably a good friend of yours.  He kept pronouncing words wrong until he said, "I think I had a stroke last night" followed by an entire minute of silence.  He then reiterated his thought, "Ya, I think so" and continued on with the lecture.  Thanks for making class interesting!

Don't ever change,
Nori

Dear Awkwardness,

Ok, ya... it's true that I have a mini-obsession with Barbie Christmas ornaments.  But hey, it's just one of my favorite Christmas traditions.  So of course I told my boyfriend. But did you really have to make that public to my boyfriend's parents.  I really enjoyed looking at all the beautifully decorated Christmas trees at the Festival of Trees.  And we could've stopped when everyone got tired.  But after my boyfriend's mom suggested that we stopped, I really enjoyed hearing his dad whisper that we couldn't until we saw the Barbies for me.  Way to make a good impression!

Love,
Nori

Dear Awkwardness,

Um... Did the zipper on my shirt really have to break while I was at work? I don't mean to be ungrateful. After all, I fortunately did have a coat with me. But my students probably thought it was a little strange that I wore my big wool pea coat--indoors--for the entire three-hours class. (Not to mention the fact that it was hot!!!)

Emily

Dear Awkwardness,

Why do you have to sneak up on me like that? I'm just so exhausted from this busy week and I was really embarrassed that I showed up late to a class wearing pajamas, complete with fuzzy slippers and my glasses. It would have been okay except my professor pulled me aside to talk to me.

The next time I get offered a job I really want, I would rather not have the conversation start with my teacher saying, "Did you just wake up?"

Sincerely,

Rachel

Dear Awkwardness,

Ok, so I guess it was sort of funny that it got announced that my boyfriend was engaged to me in his Priesthood class (ok, it wasn't really that funny).  But next time can you let me know before I show up to his Break the Fast without him.  Then I won't drop the 5 gallon jug of water that I was carrying when someone congratulated me about my engagement.  Ya, so next time just give me a fair warning.  That's all I'm asking...

See ya soon,
Nori

Dear Awkwardness,

I would appreciate it if never again an unplanned encounter at 9:00pm with a creepy guy would end with him saying, "Well, at least I know where you live now!"

Please,

Rachel

Dear Awkwardness,

Okay...getting me to lock my keys in my car...haha.  Whatevs.  I have a spare.  But how the heck did you fool me into locking my keys in the car, with the car running...without me ever realizing it?  Well, I mean I did realize it eventually, namely, when I was ready to head home for the evening 7.5 hours later.  But still...seriously?!

Not amused,
Allison

Dear Awkwardness,

Generally I go with your suggestions to talk aloud to inanimate objects and small woodland creatures.  But the next time you tell me to greet the squirrels with "Oh hey squirrel" and "Oh hey other squirrel.  Nice jump.  Lookin' good", I'd really perfer to not have a distinguished faculty member walking right behind me. 

Later,
Allison

Dear Awkwardness,

It was pretty great that you gave me the opportunity to enjoy watching the Phineas and Ferb live show down at the US Airways Center with two of my best friends. It felt really cool to walk in as three 19-year-olds and be surrounded by a bunch of families consisting mostly of kids from the ages of 3-9. But hey, I'm not complaining. Like I said, it was really fun.

Gratefully,

Rachel

Dear Awkwardness,

Thanks for coming with me to the training meeting with my boss's boss and his boss and his boss.  I realize that as a teacher, I shouldn't have been there but thanks for prompting me to ask for an invite from my boss's boss's boss's boss since he wanted me to bring my district of Elders.  It would've worked out fine but no.  I showed up without half of my Elders who decided to turn back because they had forgotten something.  It was a great feeling to show up to a meeting with all of the top bosses at the MTC and tell them that I didn't know where all of my Elders were.

Always a pleasure,
Nori

Dear Awkwardness,

Thanks for joining me just before some friends and I took off from the volleyball game we spectated.  I'll just assume that you showed up when you did because you also wanted to meet the president of the university who was also in attendance.  You probably shook his hand along with the two people on either side of me.  In fact, you were probably the one who caused him to remain completely oblivious to my extended hand--the one that remained outreached over two other people and hung in the air directly in front of him for a few painful seconds before I finally slowly retracted it.  Thanks for giving my roommate a good laugh at least.

Peace out,
Allison

Dear Awkwardness,

Now that I think about it, I've run into you several times this week... Remember Monday morning at Albertson's? The girls and I were in the produce section, and you were waiting for us by the grapes. It was very cunning of you to choose grapes--the only fruit that, when Lizzie drops it, has about a hundred little pieces that roll every which way. But I have to thank you: I'm glad it wasn't, say, a watermelon that Lizzie dropped. After all, grapes can be cleaned up pretty discretely (without the need of a mop, at least).

Oh yeah, and then there was this afternoon at the mall by the Diving Lady display. You knew I wanted to read about it, so thanks for keeping an eye on Lizzie and asking that total stranger to tell me, "There she goes!" Yes, I'm an inattentive mother. And yes, I had to run pretty quickly to catch Lizzie before she got lost and/or destroyed a store display. Thanks for the reminder--and the exercise.

Regards,
Emily